Whispers to Contemplate

Summer is in full force. The spring rains have slowed, the world seems to be preparing for another change. I ridiculously presumed that life would fall into a groove that whispered good things. It is a struggle to believe that that type of life could be mine once more.

Five years. This seems to be the time frame the world says that I should be done grieving and move on. I have nothing but a mud pit to move into if I move on.

I have been thinking (maybe too much). I ponder the good times like a child ponders a smooth rock by the seaside. The beautiful house we built with a nice deck and oh the sun rises with coffee shared together. The joy of watching the kids playing from up there. The fireworks every spring were so wonderfully seen from here. This is what wrenches my heart and brings tears.

The silly laughter as we played together as a family. The prayers when one was sick. The joy of just sharing. Sharing the highs of the day and the lows. The thanksgiving dinner that almost didn’t happen and my amazing husband who cooked it all by himself or another thanksgiving when the stove broke.

Sometimes the pain of moving on is still so over whelming that there seems to be no future.

BUT GOD!! God has promised so many good things. He promised He would never leave me. He promised to always meet my needs. He promised He would bring me to higher places. So I cry my tears every once in awhile and I mop my face – take a deep breath and whisper “thank You Jesus”.

The season of change however big or small God walks with me, He talks with me. Pushes me to lift my eyes. Not just to the next hill, But to the Son who rises above the mountain.

Author: thewidowwomanblog

I am a 53 year old widow who is watching her kids step out into life while holding tight to the Creator's hand.

11 thoughts on “Whispers to Contemplate”

  1. Once grief touches us, it becomes a part of our lives. So, there’s no real moving on because wherever we go, it’s there.

    What will change is grief itself. It will evolve from cruel and debilitating, to a soft sadness pinned with pearls of memories we hold close.

    However far down the road we go from the point of loss, there will be days when it will seem we are finally over it. But then grief returns like waves to the shore.

    We make it harder for ourselves if we perch on the wall scanning the land for when grief will end or abate. I learned that lesson late. Now, I’m trying to learn to honour my memories through thanksgiving.

    For me, that’s hope.

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  2. “…. take a deep breath and whisper “thank You Jesus”.

    You will never fail God Wendy if you can frame your pain & sorrow with words like that.

    It is said that even the biggest of storms eventually run out of water.

    As a preacher’s wife once proclaimed: “Get yourself a good prayer life because only God really understands your pain”.

    So true. He cares. Peace!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Whispering Wendy, my wise friend! LOVED this post, absolutely loved it. I could see it through your eyes as I read the words. I don’t know what the world says is the ‘correct’ time to grieve, but in my book it’s however long we survivors remain on the planet. I grieve the loss of my dad back in 1984 every day, wondering how my and my son’s life might have been had he lived. I grieve the loss of a man near and dear to my heart since that same year, who passed away in September 2017. I have those same types of memories of both of those men. BUT GOD! Is right on the money. We are both blessed in that we have good memories to savor, and had such men in our lives. May you feel the comfort of Jesus’ arms around you when the times are hard. As for the world’s view of the time to get past grieving? Methinks only those with stone cold hearts ever ‘get over it’. Blessings to you and yours and keep writing!

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